initial insertion into hostile territory-hann min 1

hello.
My pal mark invited me to contribute to this column. I'm honoured to be invited
. hehe. But partly b'cos I feel guilty 'bout not visiting him in Sg, after I clearly promised to do so and mislead a couple of souls on the false prtense I was going,including a poor chick in Kedah...my bad.
Allright, as the first entry point,let me first extapolate the boundaries and limits regarding my time here.
firstly, entries will entered on inconsistent periods.I'm a highly contradictory person, and I'll put in stuff when i FEEL like it.Muhahaha. It is of course your right to dismiss me at first hand.(0bviously)
BE MY GUEST.MAKE MY DAY....just hope u readers out there will give me a chance(one will do...hopefully)...I'm sure you'll warm up to me. (yeah right...)
Analysis: The first few paragraphs implies a highly direct , warm and personal person.
There is a hint(A HINT!!u've got yo be kidding...) of rudeness and all-knowing smartass posture.This might imply a very careless,reactionary, and reckless thinking.But a word of caution.anybody who has even glanced through Sun Tzu's(does this guy really exist?) , would remain on guard. we fail when we fail to notice we fail( wat a dick?!)
well, taking a hint from mark's title,(I'm running out of immature things to say), (kopi oh satu!), I'm not exactly sure why I should be writing this blog in the first (tahan ye...) place.
International debate ?'bout what?
About government corruption?the lack of freedom of speech? the lack of a right to free assembly? No man...I don't want no ISA in my backyard,no siree...I'm a good,loyal, and partriotic citizen. Critizisng about direct realities ain't news, its something to do when you want to look good to yourself . thats loser. Want to change the world?? JUST do it(trademarked by the nike corporation).Stop yapping!
To make my stay here entirely peaceful, harmonious, and entirely sugarcandy , I'll be in fact entirely diverting from international debate. U know?
I'll be yapping on and on...(YIKES! KILL ME!KILL ME!!),about awesome stuff like clouds, windchimes,glorious malaysian food, (Loh bak, cham peng, yeah baby...), and basically stuff that will make censors happy planet-wide.Of course, avoiding any choppy waters will also, basically, in effect, save my ass in the long run(pardon the language).It will also basically give me hope, because reading the papers today basically makes me throwup(literally).this time, i hope, will save me from meself. So I don't get pissed off all the time. So that i can basically blow some steam, refocus myself so I don't feel too down, and basically improve my command of english, so i can implicitly insult whomsoever i desire, .....without detection.Hooray!!Give me a five!
(knocks on the door)" Alloo...tis iz the Ministry of truth We l ook ing 4 this kid...u know..this traitor, who's been writing some unpallatable crap on the net..." "why ? whats up?wheres the fire bra?" "well, we(implying a fictitious organization of prole control, which OF COURSE,has nothing to do with anybody in the REAL world,OF COURSE...) wanta shoot'ya in the head bra..!!Put'cha in a black bag, disappear 4 2o yrs(divide by 10)."NO!!OMG!OMG...omg,pls bra...don't do tis to me yeah .I'm a cool bird...pls..."BANG!BANG!THRUUUUTGHRIGRUREURUGUUG ....AHHHHHHHAIER(something like in tiberium sun)"
Yeah, its getting late, gotta get some beauty sleep, stay strong people, we'll make it through. Evil people don't live long. they get angina.

Warning: The contents within this piece of writing is purely fictitious.Any resemblance to any real person or place,or organization,whether living or dead, is purely coincidental and is ,most definitely,highly regretted(Pls don't kill me, i'm harmless, and what is more, a bloody coward as is mate...)

References

"1984"George Orwell(1945)

"Angela's Ashes", Frank Mccourt(1997??)

"The Art of War", Sun Tzu, published 5 thousand yrs ago,(thx for the loan jeremy)

"Macchivellians guide to womanizing, anonymous(???)

Nike slogan used was duly referenced and acknowledged

"the Godfather part two", Francis Ford Coppola,(viewed last week, in a dark room, with....i'm not telling u !go F@#k yourself( rated pg13)(pardon the language)

the matrix trilogy',wachowski brothers,viewed god knows when(jeez...the ending sucked balls,pardon the language.)

ps. yeah, and I played Tiberium, the WESTWOOD version, when I was a kid.pity